So I Quit. And Then Came the Heart Attack.

I finally had it with the bike shop. One too many days of sitting alone at the counter waiting for the boss man to arrive. One too many instances of having given much more than was required of me and then being asked to give just a little bit more. One too many apologies to customers when shit entirely beyond my control was fucked up. One too many times of not having the information I need to do the simplest of tasks. One too many times of being asked to say a little white lie so that the shop doesn’t look like the total Flakesville that it is. One too many days of being forced to bear the responsibility for Captain Chaotica’s stressed-out life, troubled interpersonal relationships, medical problems, and poor managerial decisions.

Of course I didn’t mention that these were my real reasons for putting in an unheard of One Month’s Notice (because I am a softie and really don’t want to make my departure too stressful to the already overstressed Captain) because, really, what good would that do? Would the Captain learn anything from the truth, or in any way alter his behavior? Not Likely. Especially as the Captain is really operating in pure survival mode, almost drowning under the burden of his reality but somehow managing to keep his chin just barely above the surface.

Honestly, the moment I quit, I felt the weight taken off of me. That’s how bad the situation had become, having almost imperceptibly shifted from slightly annoying to completely unbearable over the course of my two months there. And once that weight was off, I no longer was embittered; just happy that in one month’s time, I will have moved on. I could suddenly see the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel, and I knew that it was beautiful.

Also I’ve started being completely rude to customers who annoy me, a skill honed during my many many years waiting tables at Perkins.

Annoying Guy: You just give these water bottles out, right?
Me: No. They cost $3.99. (A price I made up on the spot).
AG: But I had to wait longer than the time you told me. Shouldn’t I get it for free?
Me: No, you shouldn’t get it for free. But if it will shut you up, you can have it.
AG: (embarrassed) I mean, it’s free advertising for you.
Me: You want the free water bottle. Take the free water bottle. Just admit that you want the free water bottle because you’re greedy, not because you are altruistically looking to advertise our shop.
AG: Um, thanks for the water bottle.

So Tuesday I was going in to work. I told the Captain I would be there between 3:30 and 4:00 and I arrived at the 4:00 end of the equation, albeit still on time. And because I was still on time, I sort of maliciously took pleasure in the fact that he had to be on the receiving end of the waiting game. He had to wonder just when I would walk through the door. He had to want to leave, need to leave, and know that he was stuck there until my happy ass showed up. It was delicious. And short-lived.

I walked in to find that the Captain, who has a long history of horrible horrible heart problems, had just called 911. The store or his life in the store had literally pushed him over the edge (or swallowed him under, if I want to keep my metaphors consistent). He was wheeled out of the store on a gurney under the care and supervision of the LAFD and has been in the hospital ever since.

And who, you may ask, is holding down the fort?

You know who.